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Part of Dale’s family lives in the town of Natchitoches, Louisiana. Every year the town has a Christmas festival with a parade, fireworks, and lighted displays along the riverbank. I have never been there for the parade and the festival, but each time I have seen the lights, I have loved them.

The displays are reflected in the water and the pulsing, colorful bridge lights are timed to music. There is a tunnel of lights that flash in patterns which make you dizzy. There are the normal holiday lights of snowmen, skaters, trains, candles, nutcrackers, and Santa with sleigh. There are the Louisiana unique lights of magnolia, crayfish, and alligators.

My favorite lighted scene, however, is the depiction of the stable with star overhead, Mary and Joseph, babe in the manger, shepherd nearby, and kings making their approach. There are two lighted signs in this scene. One says Silent Night and the other says For God So Loved The World.

Nativity Christmas Lights

Every time I see it, I take heart that in this small southern town a Christmas display still depicts the birth of Christ and tells you quite clearly why God sent His Son.

I greatly admire all organized Christmas participants. They mail their cards on time, bake their cookies, make their candy, buy their gifts, mail packages early, wrap presents, decorate the house, and light the tree. My sister falls into this category of Christmas success and my father praises her peanut brittle.

I do not fall into this category. I do what must be done immediately before it must be done staying up late to accomplish the task. My mom called me at 9pm last night and discovered me baking cookies for the church Christmas Eve cookie exchange. The exchange was originally planned for Saturday, but was snowed out. I had baked peanut butter hershey kiss cookies originally, but they did not survive until Christmas Eve.

I have a general idea as to what I need to do and will suddenly focus on a task at random and it will become my priority for the moment. I do not give Dale much warning and will announce, “I think we should get the tree today and you can put lights on it tomorrow…then you and Gabe can hang the lights on the house.” Other times, I will get stuck on what gift to give to one of the children and illicit Dale’s help. These are moments Dale tries to avoid, but occasionally he cannot escape the endless search for another option which ends in no right answer.

I cannot do my shopping all at once. I have a friend who does all her Christmas shopping on one day. She shops from 8am to 10pm. I could never shop that long. Abby and my mom could, but not me. I usually purchase gifts in the order of when they have to be given: family gifts to be mailed, friends, children, and finally Dale. (Dale is last place, but don’t tell him)

On Tuesday, I had my final list and headed to the shops. The large amount of snow remaining has made parking lots random spot chaos. At the MCX (military department store), they had cleared the parking lot willy nilly. Some aisles could be entered and exited only one way, some aisles  and spaces were filled with snow, and everyone and their brother was driving about. It was madness.

I had a list and it did not include entering the MCX, (I was supposed to be going to the commissary next to it.) but I had a sudden compulsion to join the large crowd headed to the MCX and was funneled in by them. I wandered about consumed by the Holly Jolly.

Eventually, I escaped the MCX with “great gifts I didn’t know I needed”, bought the food I actually needed, and dropped everything at home. I now had three more stores to go. At the first store, I did well sticking to the list. On my way to the second store, Dale called and said, “Zeke needs water proof mittens.” “OK,” I thought, “I’ll just run into this other store not on my list.” From past experience, I should have realized I was at the brink.

There is always an item that is unattainable. Each year it changes and when I begin to look for it, I cannot stop trying to find it. I waste more time looking for it than it is worth. I will search and search throughout a store, looking everywhere and will slowly enter the “Holly Jolly Haze.” All focused thoughts disappear, nothing on the list can be found, and I wander at random in a slow distracted ineffective manner.

It is near impossible to escape the Holly Jolly Haze.  Shopping becomes painful and if someone asks if they can help me find something, I can no longer give them a cohesive answer. Truly, it is best to go home, sleep, and try again another day, but even this simple decision escapes me.

Eventually, I stumbled home fortified by a hot cocoa topped with whipped cream and chocolate shavings. It didn’t snap me out of the Holly Jolly Haze, but it sure tasted good.

There are times in life when you are unable to pay someone back. People show kindness towards you and you are never able to repay them. During Christmas time, I often think of Russ Hawkinson.  He was not our Grandfather by blood, but our Grandfather by action. He always helped my family when I was growing up and money was tight.

My mom would receive a Christmas card and tucked inside was some money to buy gifts for five kids or to pay for a ham. It was given out of love and there was no pay back expected. He had the means to give and he gave. Kindness…often we think it so rare.

A few months ago, I got a flat tire. I am embarrassed to admit that I have never changed a flat tire. I found the manual, opened up the back of the van, and discovered I could not even turn the jack loose from it’s holder. I called my husband who was just leaving work and would not be home for an hour or more. He let me know he couldn’t help me. His only advice was, “Look helpless.”

A car pulled into the parking lot to drop off a well dressed man in a very nice suit. His car was parked just down from mine. I walked over and asked him if he could just help me figure out how to get the jack out of it’s holder and then I would attempt the next step. He looked at me, the manual, the van and told his buddy who had dropped him off, “You go ahead, I’m going to help her.”

He changed the flat tire and I stood there and watched his very expensive shirt get ruined. When he was finished, I told him the story of my husband’s bit of advice to “Look helpless.” He told me, “Tell him it worked.” Dale, of course, thinks this vindication of his great advice. For some reason, I don’t view it the same way.

I asked the man who helped me if there was anything I could do to help him or anything I could give him for his trouble. He said “No. Pay it forward.” I had seen that movie years ago and understand the power of that action from a Christian viewpoint. We are called to help others as if Christ himself were in need of help. It is all a part of the principle of “Love thy Neighbor.”

Last month, the endless needs of my “neighbors” sought to overwhelm me. I was asked again to bless someone I did not know and I struggled with the selfish thought of “I cannot do one more thing, God. I am overwhelmed.” I did it out of obedience, but not initially with a giving heart. Later, when I came face to face with the need, I was ashamed at my selfishness.

Immediately after I agreed to meet that need, God blessed us in a totally unexpected way. “I can’t out give you, God.” I thought. “I think I have given so much, and compared to what You have given me, it is so very little.”

A week ago, the endless needs of my “neighbors” sought again to overwhelm me. I was asked again to bless someone I did not know.  Again I thought, “I will do this, but I cannot do one more thing, God. I am overwhelmed.”

The next day, I read a teaching which revealed to me my wrong focus. Truly, I cannot meet the overwhelming needs of everyone that surrounds me, but I can meet the need of the one that God directs me to. I must ask God every time, “Do You want me to meet this need God? If so, help me to do it.”

This morning, I dropped Josiah off at the bus and while returning home I found myself a few cars behind someone driving with a flat tire. The person directly behind him passed on the right, the Marine in front of me hurried off to work, the policeman driving by in the other direction did not stop.

Finally, the car pulled off into a parking lot and I followed. An elderly man got out of the car and I walked over to see how I could help. I did not know him. He simply asked me for a ride home. He lives approximately 5 blocks from me.

After I dropped him off, I thanked God for that flat tire months ago, for without having experienced that sinking feeling I experienced with a flat tire, I may not have pulled over to help. I told the man about my flat tire and how I was told to pay it forward. He told me he always stops to help people and his wife tells him he is crazy to do it.

I know I must be wise when I offer to help someone, but I knew God was asking me, once again, one more thing.

“Remember your free cheese…Provide food for people who are hungry.”

“Remember your Christmas gift…Provide gifts for a child with nothing.”

“Remember your flat tire…Provide a ride for an elderly man.”

Love your neighbor – Show Kindness – Pay it forward. It is what we are called to do.

Every year Abby’s middle school hosts a Christmas party where the boys must wear ties and the girls must wear pretty dresses. I have learned it is not easy to find appropriate dresses for girls ages 11-13. They outgrow the little girls dresses and the junior dress assortment is either too casual or decidedly lacking in material.

Last year we searched and searched in vain until I drove to Richmond and went to Dilliards. Dilliards is a department store based in Texas. Therefore, they have plenty of teenage girl shoppers who need party dresses for quinceanera and debutante events. They have the most lovely little girl dress department.

Even though Abby can still fit in some of the dresses in the girls department, she refused to buy one. “Look how cute this is,” I would say. She would say nothing and just give me the teenage girl flat eyed glare. She may have done a bit of over exaggerated sighing as well.

Prior to driving to Richmond, Abby had printed out pictures of dress possibilities from their online store. Her father did not care for these possibilities for they were all lacking in material. So, we had discussions regarding appropriate dress length and shoulder coverage. Almost all junior dresses have skimpy straps or no straps at all which forces you to buy a sweater.

Abby loves to shop. My mom loves to shop. I do not love to shop. I suppose this is why on the way to Richmond Abby told me  “You make it no fun.” My most enjoyable shopping experience is when I can give Abby and my mom the money and wait for them to return and tell me about the great deal they found. However, my mom is too occupied for shopping right now, so Abby is stuck with me.

For Abby there are a few absolute No’s with clothing: No elastic, No scratchy netting, and absolutely No puffed sleeves. Even though the sweater was really cute and the puff on the sleeve was really small or the netting was a tiny amount on the bottom of the inside skirt…No! No! No!

Abby tried on dress after dress. Too short…Too skimpy…Too old…Wrong color… Finally a peacock blue dress with a skirt that fell below the knees. The shoulders were bare, so we started in on the sweaters. Too short…Too skimpy… Too old…Wrong color.

Sweaters were abandoned for capes. We disregarded Edna Mode’s advice of “No Capes!” and found a black cape to wear with the dress. Victory! We went to the register to pay and the girl rung up Abby’s dress. Without my being aware of it, Abby had chosen a dress that was 50% off. She did her grandma proud.