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The reunion weekend blogs would not be complete if I didn’t tell the tale of our drive home from Pennsylvania.

First, I have a question. Can any of you Pennsylvanians explain to me why everyone must exit the toll road and drive two blocks through town in order to get onto I70?

Admittedly, on the way there, Mom did appreciate the drive through coffee shop on our side of the road. However, on the way home, the enormous volume of traffic deterred everyone from attempting to do anything except stay in their lanes. It is a mess of an intersection with all the semi trucks, traffic lights, shops, and restaurants. Why does the exit of one interstate not connect to the entrance of another interstate in a fly over ramp?

Once we were through the baffling intersection, we reentered West Virginia. We had learned our lesson and this time through, we chose not to stop for coffee. Instead, we stopped for a pulled pork barbecue sandwich at an old country store, and had a good lunch.

When we entered Virginia, we stopped again at a farmers market and bought some corn on the cob, honey, and funnel cake mix. After that, we were feeling pretty good and traveled along at a steady clip. However, I noticed Mom was starting to fade, and figured I better stop and get her a cup of coffee.

There is always a moment when traveling with someone that what annoys your companion the most about you is revealed quite harshly. This was that moment. After this incident occurred, our trip took a turn for the worse.

I annoy Mom when I am excessively bossy and stubborn. (I know you all just thought, “When is Mugs NOT excessively bossy and stubborn?”) (You can keep that comment to yourself.)

Mom annoys me when she changes her mind on a dime. (As my brother Howie terms it, “There’s always another option.”)

These two annoyances went head to head and we soon found ourselves in an argument  about where to stop for coffee and what was acceptable to buy at a coffee shop.

The incident proceeded as follows: I saw a sign for the coffee shop. I exited the Interstate.  I misunderstood the directional sign and got in the wrong lane.  Mom said, “That’s alright we can just go to (Zeke’s favorite restaurant)”. I did not want to go to that restaurant, so I maneuvered over to the other lane and waited at an interminably long light. Mom, said, “Why are you so stubborn? We can just go to (Zeke’s favorite restaurant).” I replied, “Because I don’t want to go there.”

I wanted to order tea and that restaurant had terrible tea. Eventually, we arrived at the drive-thru of the coffee shop, and I ordered an awake tea latte.

Mom said, “Oh, that sounds good. I’ll have one of those too.”

I replied, “No, you won’t. You’ll have coffee.” I then ordered her a coffee.

She was indignant that I had not allowed her to go to the easier restaurant or to  order what she wanted.

I know I cannot defend my actions, but my thought process was as follows: She needed caffeine, I knew the tea didn’t have enough caffeine, and I figured that if she did not get coffee now, I would have to stop again in the near future to get her a cup of coffee.

We were both in a bit of a huff when we pulled onto the interstate and came to a complete stop. We would eventually discover that there had been an accident involving an RV and the interstate was closed in both directions creating a 5 mile back up. Over the next hour, the back up would eventually stretch to 10 miles.

Immediately, I made a good decision and exited the interstate. I called Dale to find out what was going on and followed the cars off the exit. Then, I made a bad decision and followed the cars right back onto the interstate via another entrance. Next, I lost phone reception.

As we inched along, I realized Mom and I were going to be in the car for a lot longer than expected, and I determined it was best to apologize for my actions. Wanting to have some justification, I explained that tea had 1/4 of the caffeine of coffee.

We inched along some more and she admitted that since it appeared we wouldn’t be getting home any time soon, it was probably better that she had gotten coffee to drink.

We continued to inch along. As I drove in the left lane, I prayed for a safe spot to cross the median. More time passed and eventually I saw some tire tracks. Nervously, I followed the tracks, praying I wouldn’t get stuck in the ditch. When I peeled out onto the west bound lanes I shouted “Praise the Lord!”

My phone reception returned and I called Dale back. I asked him to find the country roads that would get me from Fauquier County (the western county where I was) to Stafford County (where I live). He gave the country road directions and off we went, happy again with our adventure.

When I was growing up, I watched my father find alternative routes in order to avoid traffic. I would often get irritated by this. “Why do we have to drive the back way?” I would think. Now I do the very same thing.

It doesn’t matter how far out of the way I go, or what obscure roads I take, if I am moving along at a decent clip and not crawling along in traffic, I am happy.

I was curving and swerving and driving on some small roads. I didn’t drive faster than the 45 mph speed limit, because the roads were so twisty and I wasn’t sure when we would have to turn. As we drove along, this SUV was right behind me, tailgating me the whole way. There was no where to pull off, I couldn’t drive any faster, and I was getting more and more irritated.

After ten minutes, I finally saw a place to pull over to let him pass. I pulled over and he proceeded to pull up right alongside me and roll down his window. I was a bit worried that I would soon get an earful for not pulling over sooner. I rolled down my window anyway.

“Are you as lost as me?” he asked.

I laughed and told him that I was following my husband’s directions to get home to Stafford. He was headed to Richmond, so I told him I could get him to highway 17. He told me he knew how to get home from there.

I pulled out in front of him again and off we drove. Eventually, we drove onto a four lane highway. Once on the highway, he passed me with a wave and off he went. “I guess he knows highway 211,” I told Mom. Mom and I stopped at a gas station to take a break and buy a Fauquier County Map. While I was looking through the maps, he came into the station and asked if I was the woman he had been following.

When we got onto the four lane, he had thought he was on 17. After awhile, he realized he wasn’t, and came back to buy a map. We then had a discussion with the gas station attendants on the best way to get to 17. One suggested we back track, and the other told me to continue with Dale’s back road directions. The guy left to follow the back track route.

It took Mom and I another ten minutes to leave. We stuck with Dale’s route through the country, and when we finally pulled onto 17, the guy drove up behind us and passed us with a wave. We laughed. The back way had gotten us there faster.

I may look like I’m lost, but I’m making good time.